Freya Lorelei (freyalorelei) wrote,
Freya Lorelei

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Who says you can't buy happiness? Mine cost $2.88 at the drugstore.

After a long, slow, miserable decline, which culminated in dropping a college course I was failing and deliberately driving my car into a telephone pole just so that I could feel something (twice!), I went to the doctor and begged her to give me SOMETHING to help me get through this facepunch of a year.

I walked out with my latest prescription, to be taken with my Adderall: Citalopram, the generic form of Celexa. It's apparently an antidepressant/antianxiety combo, recommended for patients with major depressive disorder and social phobias (both of which have been plaguing me for some time, although everything snowballed into a perfect shitstorm in under a year), which is nice because among other issues, I've been having a minimum of two panic attacks on a daily basis for months. I'm talking full-blown, hyperventilating, sweating, oh-my-God-I'm-going-to-die panic attacks. Apparently most people who get them (when they get them at all) have, oh, one or two a LIFETIME. If you're very unlucky, they're once every few months or weeks. I have multiple attacks every day.

So yeah. This shit better work. I can't go on like this.
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